Some nights I
Find comfort in that
I am not
The only one
Who is a failure
In love, life
Friendships, art, speaking
And all else.
A sweating, weeping
Mess, I wake.
April5 TrystYour beautiful back
Billowing like summer clouds
Throws me in a trance.
I'm in love, but we
Have never met, and never
Will. Forget about me, I
April3 HeavyI am but
A heavy oil
That will never dry.
The paint is thick
But my mouth
April1 What Is This Dream? Qué es este sueño?
That I cannot
Awake from nor
A cat laying
Breath15 a minute, 900 an hour, 21,600 a day, 7,884,000 a year
This is how I breath.
In my 15 breaths, 20 children die.
And in a year I waste 7,884,00 breaths
Breaths that could save a life or a love or the world but instead I waste them.
I don't understand.
Because I don't stop there
I waste your breath as well.
And so I don't object when you take the breath from my lungs in a rush of passion
Neither of us comprehends, because it belongs to you anyways.
In my wasted 126,144,000 breaths, I have done nothing worthwhile,
But the future is a big place (supposedly)
StarsI found stars of tea this eve. They were almost beautiful.
I realized these stars held my future, and
Try as I might to arrange them into my desired constillations
They move no more than the dead.
My belly becomes the holder of my
Future, now that I've sipped half the tea away,
and all the stars are gone and because I took so long the tea is cold and I wonder, Like the night I sat with a girl I wasn't sure I loved by the river
I wasn't sure existed; I wonder
If this is what G-d feels like.
Does s/he stare into rivers of tea and stars and wonder about the future?
Does she want to catch a body whilst coming through the rye,
Or would she prefer to just meet and talk instead?
I've reached the pinnacle of my journey; the bottom of the cup.
I found the stars again, in tight-knit nebula emitting a
Kind of pure radiance only I can see.
Which is probably what love is like.
Unable to reach any conclusion I pour the last bit of tea out.
I find no answers to the questions I pose.
Tonight, I though
J'eris en FrancaisJ'ai écrit dans français aujourd' hui,
Parce que quand je fais, je sentis
Je sais ça moi ne suis pas,
Mais tu je laisses j'ai mon amusant.
Sempiternal George Proulx awoke to a banausic morning. This particular Tuesday morning, George dreaded getting out of bed; not to say that he didn’t dread getting out of bed every morning he had to work. Thus is the life of a cubicle worker.
While dragging himself into the shower, George decided he would go out for breakfast that morning, since he was out of artificially fruit flavored cereal. (He never really understood why “fruit” was included in the name of such cereals, since the cereal tastes nothing like fruit, but he didn’t bother to ask.) George was the sort of man that did the majority of his day’s pondering in the shower, since his job required tedious attention to small percentiles.
Once out of the shower (and dressed, mind you) Geor
her dreams all broken loose.
escaped her past,
they roost now in the tangles
of her disordered present.
You just need focus,
the tree is the simpler task.
One must expect blurred edges,
truth inferred rather than seen.
PoemsSitting in a corner,
As I always do,
Lost in the nothing,
Surrounded by it too,
I turn to you,
Then you turn away,
A scamper here,
And a tumble there,
Is that all the effort that you got?
Laying on my bed,
The ceiling above,
Blank as always,
Boring as always,
Just like you,
Lying as always,
Denying as always,
Is it really that hard for you to see?
Turning the knob,
You invite yourself in,
Go away I tell you,
But you ignore me,
You scream and yell,
You beat my insides,
Making life a hell,
It brings you pleasure,
I know it does,
You like seeing me this way,
How many days I wonder,
Until I fade away?
Staring at me,
Into insides beyond the mere,
I'm only a child,
A poor defenseless child,
How you love watching me crumble,
Being blown away by little things,
You love this more than anything,
And all you do is deny what I say,
My soul will burn,
And the insides split,
While you remain unswayed....
How little you see,
Nothing new for me,
the perfect spiral
of my worn
asking her out
I proofread every word
to the free space
in my journal-
but how can five lines
hold autumn dusk?
sorority bake sale
the girl I dumped
a cold brownie
of a stray dog
the tarot woman's hand
against my own
even in the cool
of night air
Smooth PebblesEvery swooning blade of grass vindicated.
The deep blue silence of a turning wheel.
A precise number of fireflies in the apples.
The coiled jealousy of all reptiles.
The palsy of a prisoner's first sob.
A tranquil sorrow in a dog's ribcage.
All faces obliterated from the moon.
Nirvana observed among smooth pebbles.
The slough of mountain summits in decline.
Every planet reprieved of its orbit.
The ecstasy within a mandala.
The space between spaces.
Honing the blade.